Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative Path: newserv.ksu.ksu.edu!moe.ksu.ksu.edu!vixen.cso.uiuc.edu!howland.reston.ans.net!usc!elroy.jpl.nasa.gov!lll-winken.llnl.gov!fnnews.fnal.gov!att-in!cbnewsm!vsuhocki From: vsuhocki@cbnewsm.cb.att.com (v.p.suhocki) Subject: Re: Frengi (sp?) Laws for business Organization: AT&T Date: Tue, 24 May 1994 02:11:20 GMT Message-ID: References: <2rpfmm$t1p@usenet.INS.CWRU.Edu> Lines: 103 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- =-=-=-= THE RULE$ OF ACQUI$ITION - FERENGI =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- =-=-=-= [You can distribute this list as you wish, as long as you don't modify it!] Compiled by.......: Martin Goulet (gouletm@JSP.UMontreal.CA) Last updated......: May 23, 1994 New rules.........: 285 (The collaborator) 1. Once you have their money, you never give it back. [Rom, "The Nagus"] 3. Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to. [Quark, "The Maquis Part II"] 6. Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity. [Zek, "The Nagus"] 7. Keep your ears open. [Odo, "Hands of the prophet"] 9. Opportunity plus instinct equals profit. [Nog, "The Storyteller"] 16. A deal is a deal. [Quark, "Melora"] 21. Never place friendship above profit. [Quark, "Rules of acquisition"] 22. A wise man can hear profit in the wind. [Pel, "Rules of acquisition"] 31. Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother. [Quark, "The siege"] 33. It never hurts to suck up to the boss. [Quark & Pel, "Rules of acquisition"] 47. Never trust anyone whose suit is nicer than your own. [Quark, "Rivals"] 48. The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife. [Pel, "Rules of acquisition"] 57. Good customers are as rare as latinum, treasure them. [Quark, "Armageddon game"] 59. Free advice is seldom cheap. [Quark, "Rules of acquisition"] 62. The riskier the road, the greater the profit. [Pel, "Rules of acquisition"] 76. Every once in a while declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemies. [Quark, "The homecoming"] 103. Sleep can interfere .... [cut off] [Pel, "Rules of acquisition"] 109. Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack. [Quark, "Rivals"] 112. Never have sex with the boss' sister. [Quark, "Playing God"] 139. Wives serve, brothers inherit. [Odo, "Necessary evil"] 194. It's always good business to know about new customers before they walk in your door. [Quark wasn't sure of the number of this one] [Quark, "Whispers"] 214. Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach. [Quark, "The Maquis Part I"] 285. No good deed ever goes unpunished. [Quark, "The collaborator"] =-=-=-=-= NOTES =-=-=-=-= * In the TNG episode "Bloodlines", cmdr. Riker mentions that the Ferengi governement is debating an amendment to the Rules of Acquisition. (stardate 47829.1) * We know from Quark (The Maquis Part I) and from Pel (Rules of acquisition) that there are 285 rules of acquisition. * Quark mentionned rule #223 in "Profit and Loss". * Pel may have invented what she said from the rule #103 -- /vsuhocki@cbnewsm.cb.att.com|Disclaimer: My opinions are my own, and \ |attbl!cbnewsm!vsuhocki |not affiliated, or related to my employer's| \PGP key available by finger|-------------------------------------v1.4--/