The following are a collection of filksongs written by Tammy Potash. You can reach Tammy in the Fidonet TREK conference. "End of an Era" (to "Teen Angel") That fateful night, May 28th, The final fade to black. The Enterprise has left our screens; It won't be coming back. TNG, now it's over, TNG, sad but true, That lovely ship, of silver sleek, We won't have a new show next week. We'll faithfully watch Deep Space Nine, And Voyager when it starts, But the Enterprise has a special place, In Every Trek Fan's heart. TNG, now it's over, TNG, sad but true, That lovely ship, of silver sleek, We won't have a new show next week. Just 7 years, and now it's gone, But we await the day, The brand-new movie comes to town; And the Trek fans all will play. TNG, now it's over, TNG, sad but true. No more trips thru starry skies, But history shall not forget The... name... of En... ter... prise. -- Tammy Potash Now a DS9 filk... To: "City of New Orleans" by Arlo Guthrie "The Ballad of Deep Space Nine" Dockin at the new Bajoran station; Odo says; no weapons on the Promenade; Don't stop at Quark's unless you're carrying Latinum; And Garak's got some awfully nice clothes he's made. The Major says; Goodbye Cardassia I hate you! You occupied for over 60 years! You made all us Bajorans live in terror But we fought you, with just blood, sweat, and tears. Well you know the replicators are barely workin' And I don't care for that "glop on a stick." Bashir says that I'm gonna get malnutrition, But chasin' down Klingon Ghak just makes me sick. The Major says; Goodbye Cardassia I hate you! You occupied for over 60 years! You made all us Bajorans live in terror But we fought you, with just blood, sweat, and tears. Well I figure that it's time to leave the station; I'm headed off to Risa for a tan. Commander Sisko caught me ogling that chick with freckles; He told me not to freak, but she used to be a MAN! The Major says; Goodbye Cardassia I hate you! You occupied for over 60 years! You made all us Bajorans live in terror But we fought you, with just blood, sweat, and tears. You know I really hate to leave the station; Everyone but Odo treated me fine; I even hear they fixed those replicators; So I think I'll be coming back to Deep Space Nine. The Major says; Goodbye Cardassia I hate you! You occupied for over 60 years! You made all us Bajorans live in terror But we fought you, with just blood, sweat, and tears. (fade down and out) --Tammy Potash other filks... "Dockin' At Deep Space Nine" (to Creedence Clearwater Revival's "Lookin' Out My Back Door") Just got back from New Bajor, Docked my ship in Bay Four, Got to sit down, Have a drink, Down at Quark's! Intoxication sets in, Pretty soon I'm singin': Dock, dock, dock, dockin' at Deep Space Nine! Sisko's playin' baseball, Bashir hits on one and all, (*) Look at all the Dabo winners Dancin' down the hall! Shapeshifter patrolman, Wormhole smoothly flowin', Dock, dock, dock, dockin' at Deep Space Nine! Latinum and Lurians, (MORN!) Ferengi close at hand, Won't 'cha take a ride On a runabout with me? (Dee dee dee dee) Can you fix this, O'Brien? Bajor now has Kai Winn, Dock, dock, dock, dockin' at Deep Space Nine! (bridge) Latinum and Lurians, (MORN!) Ferengi close at hand, Won't 'cha take a ride On a runabout with me? (Dee dee dee dee) Can you fix this, O'Brien? Bajor now has Kai Winn, Dock, dock, dock, dockin' at Deep Space Nine! (bridge) Lots of trouble, Bajor, Won't worry 'bout it any more, Look at all the Dabo winners Dancin' down the hall! (slowly) Can you fix this, O'Brien? Bajor now has Kai Winn, Dock, dock, dock, dockin' at Deep Space Nine! (fade down and out) --Tammy Potash * hits on, as in flirting with. "Deep Space Rhapsody" (to Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody) Is this the wormhole, Is this an anomaly? Is it Cardassia? Take a runabout and go out and see... I'm just from Bajor, I need no sympathy, Because I'm Commander Sisko, A shapeshifter named Odo, Any host that Dax goes, Doesn't really matter to me, to me. Garak, not what he seams, Got a wire in his head, If Bashir pulls it then he's dead! Bloody computer! I just fixed the thing... And who demoted me on DS9? Latinum, is all Quark needs, But when Vash appeared, She gave oomaks to his ears.... I see a shapeshifter, sleeping in a bucket Treknobabble, Treknobabble how we gonna block their phasers! Gul Dukat and Kai wars, very very delighting me! Do you think you can pull out and let Bajor die! Do you think that Vedda Gwinn should really be Kai? Oh, Odo, What sort of race are you Odo? Don't change that dial, don't change that dial, Deep Space Nine's on... (softly) Deep Space Nine is awesome, anyone can see Deep Space Nine is awesome, Deep Space Nine is awesome, Deep Space Nine is awesome, Tee... vee... Any way the wormholes... (Crash!) --Tammy Potash, EchoTimeLordandFilkerExtraordinaire, (to "Crazy Little Thing Called Love," by Queen") AND NOW, THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR; THE NEXT DS9 MUSIC VIDEO! (focus on Vedek Dex, in motorcycle jacket, with pompador, looking totally cool. He is joined by Doctor Bashir as they start the first EchoDuet!) (parts as indicated. Singer keeps on till a change is shown)) "Crazy Little Trill Called Dax" (Vedek Dex on guitar) This Trill, called Dax, <---Bashir I just can't handle worms! This Trill, called Dax I can't... get a date with her! She's not ready! Crazy little Trill called Dax! (drums) This Trill (this Trill) <---Bashir (Vedek Dex on chorus) Called Dax, (called Dax) I try (and keep failing) <---Bashir To make time with her! I saw (woo woo) (Vedek Dex on response) Her kiss (woo woo) A guy with no bones, like a jelly fish! But we like her! <---- Vedek Dex Crazy little Trill called Dax! There goes Jadzia, <---- Vedek Dex singing) She's nothing like Curzon Drives Bashir crazy! She gives him hot n' cold fever, She leaves him in a cool cool sweat. (more Vedek Dex's guitar work) I've got to be cool, <---Bashir Relax, Don't think Bout Jadzia Dax! Play tennis, work out, Take a long ride on a runabout, Till she likes me! Crazy little Trill called Dax! (mind-bogglingly good instrumental guitar by Vedek Dex) (drums by Volehunters) (yeah) <--- Vedek Dex I've got to be cool, <---Bashir Relax, Don't think Bout Jadzia Dax! Play tennis, (ahum) (Vedek humming) Work out, (ahum) Take a long ride on a runabout, Till she likes me! (going steady!) Crazy little Trill called Dax! This Trill, called Dax, I just can't handle worms; <---Bashir This Trill, called Dax I can't get a date with her! She's not ready! (woo ooo ooo!) Crazy little Trill called Dax! Crazy little Trill called Dax! (uh huh) <--Bashir, with Vedek Dex on chorus) Crazy little Trill called Dax! (yeah yeah) Crazy little Trill called Dax! (yeah yeah) Crazy little Trill called Dax! (yeah yeah) Crazy little Trill called Dax! (yeah yeah) Crazy little Trill called Dax! (yeah yeah) (fade down and out) --performance by the Volehunters, lyrics by Tammy Potash And now; The Next DS9 Music Video! In an alternate reality, Verad kept Dax, and Jadzia died. But who's to say Dax likes its new host? (focus on: Verad Dax, nearly swallowed up by the darkness. He stands just outside Quark's, which is closed. The environmental controls on the Promenade have failed again, spectacularly so, causing it to rain inside the station. It's raining hard. Verad Dax holds an empty bottle loosely in one hand. As he sings, conflicting emotions cross his face; Dax is taking direct control, overriding the host...) "Jadzia" (to "Donna" by Ritchie Valens) Jad...zia, Jad...zia, Jad...zia, Jad...zia. I had a Trill, Jadzia was her name, Since Verad stole me I've never been the same, 'Cause I loved that Trill, Jadzia oh where can you be? And why aren't you me? Verad Dax spends all his latinum on drink, But when he's unconscious I'm still left to think, That I loved my Trill, Jadzia oh where can you be? And why aren't you me? Jad... zia, when Verad's gone, I don't think I'll be Joining anew, (oo oo) `Cause of all, all-of-my-hosts, I loved, only you! I had a Trill, Jadzia was her name, Since Verad stole me I've never been the same, 'Cause I loved that Trill, Jadzia oh where can you be? And why aren't you me? Jad...zia, Jad...zia, Jad...zia, Jad...zia... (fade down and out) --Performance by the Volehunters; lyrics by Tammy Potash. "Deep Space 9 (Not Terok Nor Station) (to "Istanbul/Not Constantinople" by They Might Be Giants) (apologies to Jason Levine) Terok Nor was run by Cardassia Bajor was occupied by Cardassia Been a short time gone, not run by Cardassia, Now it's Deep Space Nine, and it runs just fine! Deep Space Nine, not Terok Nor Station, Now it's Ba-jor-an, not a Cardassian station, So if you've a date at Terok Nor Station, She'll be waiting on Deep Space Nine. Even Rom-u-lus Once had another name Why they changed it I can't say The UFP just likes it that way! Oh, take me back to Terok Nor Station No you can't go back to Terok Nor Station Been a short time gone, not run by Cardassia, Why did Terok Nor station get the works? (*) Because the Cardies are all such jerks! Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do DS9... (DS9...) Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do DS9... (DS9...) Even Rom-u-lus Once had another name Why they changed it I can't say The UFP just likes it that way! Terok Nor was run by Cardassia Now it's Deep Space Nine, not Terok Nor Station, Been a short time gone, Terok Nor Station, Why did Terok Nor Station get the works? Because the Cardies are all such jerks! Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do Do do do, do do do do-do-do-do Do, do, do-do-do do do do Oh, take me back to Terok Nor Station No you can't go back to Terok Nor Station The only way to Terok Nor Station Is back in the Evil Universe, But there you'll find conditions are even worse! Deep Space Niiiiiiine! --Tammy Potash * "get the works"-- in the sense of trashing, destroying, vandalizing "J-N-T's Dream" (from Jesus Christ Superstar's "Pilate's Dream") I dreamed I met a Gallifreyan; a most amazing man. He had that ship you very rarely find; the blue, police-box kind. I asked him to say why he left there, (*) I asked him why he ran. He looked at me with sadness in his eyes; They were bluer than the skies! And next the room was full of very different men! They seemed to be this man! They merged with him and then... they disappeared again! Then I saw, thousands of Whovians, sighing for this man; And then they asked of me, "Oh when will he be back?" But that is knowledge that I lack! --Tammy Potash and Robin E. Baylor * as in why he left Gallifrey. J-N-T is John Nathan Turner, formerly Dr. Who producer. Over and out...