Yeah, right, and monkeys will fly out of my butt!
Whoa!  Monkeys flew out of your butt!  Ouch!  Ouch!  OUCH!! (big one)
Whoa!  Monkeys flew out of %1's butt!  ...   That looks awfully painful!
Whoa!  Monkeys flew out of %1's butt!  ...   That looks awfully painful!