S3
P1
EP
¤9¥2  INTERVIEW WITH

 THE GRIM REAPER!¥1¤1


It's  a  cold winter night and strange
noises  sound  all over the graveyard.
Rotting    moss    clings   onto   the
tombstones   and   terribly  distorted
shadows  wander  among the old graves.
Despite the fact that it's Al Bundy on
TV,   one   of   our  daring  editors,
Santiago,  has just entered the place,
hoping that he will have the chance of
interviewing  one  of  the  most known
nightshift   worker   on   earth.    A
slightly   uneasy   feeling   troubles
Santiago's  mind when he realizes that
the  doorbell  to the Reaper's tomb is
made  of  human  bones and has a large
number  of notepads hung up beside it.
He  pushes the button and a sound like
a  coffinlid  opening  penetrates  the
ð
air.
Somebody VERY skinny opens the door.

¤6> Santiago   ¤4: doorguard   ¤2- The Death

¤4: Yes? What is it? Oh no... Not one of
  you Swedes  again.  Last time we had 
  some here they almost tore the whole
  place down.

¤6> Hrmm.....  Well... Actually, I'm not
  quite  dead  yet.  I  was invited to
  interview the Grim Reaper.

¤4: Oh, I see. You must be from Joyride,
  eh?  The boss  got it  just recently
  from one of his  swapper-contacts in
  India, Kali. You know her? Not??!!!!
  Pity, she's a nice girl...

¤6> ...Excuse  me for  interrupting, but
  about that interview...

Ð
¤4: Ah... Sorry! Follow me...

¤1The doorguard grabs a lamp that  has a
design  similar  to a skull  and limps
away.  The now quite freezing reporter
follows  him into a dark  room with an
even darker shape in the middle.   The
doorguard  slips out  through  a side-
door.

¤2- GOOD EVENING..... SO,  YOU'VE GOT MY
  LETTER.

¤6> Yes...  If you mean the bloodstained
  parchment  of human skin that  I had
  to go and  fetch  at the post office
  just  because you had  forgot to pay
  the postage.

¤2- POSTAGE?

¤6> Nevermind....    I'll start with the
  questions...  How does it feel to be
ð
  Mr. C Ruel Death, PhD in torture and
  pain,  alias the Grim Reaper or,  as
  your  cousin  the Devil  calls  you,
  Skinny?   

¤2- GOOD!!! BUT I SOMETIMES MISS FOOD...

¤6> Eh?! How old are you?

¤2- MY AGE??  I'M OLDER THAN THIS PLANET
  BUT  I TRY  TO  POLISH THE POLLUTION
  DAMAGE  FROM  MY BONES TO  MAKE THEM
  SHINE  WHITE AND GIVE  ME A YOUTHFUL
  LOOK...

¤6> Ah, I see. Have you never thought of
  retiring?

¤2- OH... YES, I'M GOING TO RETIRE SOON.
  I  JUST  HAVE  TO  HAVE  SOMEONE  TO
  REPLACE ME. SAY, I COULDN'T PLACE AN
  AD INTO YOUR MAG??

Ð
¤6> Sure... Why not... But first... What
  are your hobbies?

¤2- I HAVE JUST RECENTLY BOUGHT AN A4000
  ON WHICH I LIKE  TO PLAY GAMES  WITH
  A LOT OF BLOOD IN....... I ALSO LIKE
  CUTTING OFF STUPID REPORTERS' HEADS.

¤6> (Gulp) ...How...nice...

¤2- YES!!  AS  MY  MOTHER  ALWAYS  SAID:
  DON'T PLAY WITH YOUR SCYTHE CHARLES.
  WHY  DON'T  YOU  GO CUT  SOME  HEADS
  INSTEAD.

¤6> Mother??!!!  I  didn't think you had
  any parents!

¤2- WELL, HRMM... THEY DIED BEFORE I WAS
  BORN...  EHM...  WHY  DON'T  WE TALK
  ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE INSTEAD.. LOOK,
  DO  YOU  WANT  THE  RECIPE   FOR  MY
  FABULOUS BRAINSAUCE? IT'S DELICIOUS!
ð
¤6> Thanks,  but  no thanks  (YUCK!),  I
  think  I'll  stick  to hamburgers...
  Ah... One other thing... Do you know
  what the meaning of life is?!!

¤2- SURE! IT'S SIMPLY THAT...

¤1(A bloodchilling  gong  echoes through
the chambers.)

¤2- SORRY, TIME'S UP!!!  SEE YOU SOON...
  AFTER  THAT TRAIN ACCIDENT  ON  YOUR
  WAY HOME THIS EVENING..... DAMN.....
  I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT...

¤6> Oh.. I think I'll take the bus! Bye!

¤1Later  that night many witnesses saw a
wildeyed  editor,  who  was  trying in
vain  to  find  a  bus  that was still
running....
Ð