TITLE:REVIEWS ON SALE - WHERE DI PIETRO HAS NOT ARRIVED YET PALETTE:0223 088a 08a9 0bb9 3 REVIEWS ON SALE 2 By Macno After the incredible insuccess of the first edition of REVIEWS ON SALE nobody has tried to corrupt me for a bribed review. There could be two reasons for such a surprising reaction. The first one is that everybody thinks that I write bribed reviews even without receiving any monetary contribution, as if Scenarium were a humanitary organization. The second one is that the possible clients may think that our reviews are not trustworthy and that the same readers may understand that they are heavily influenced by factors not exactly related to the quality of the reviewed production. This second hypothesis implies that our readers are intelligent and that they understand what I write (and don't understand too). Interesting theory that should deserve deeper studies. The first reason is totally silly, since the money earned with these REVIEWS ON SALE, with the official sponsor and all the advertisments allow me to afford all the expenses for official spreaders and co-editors and contributors (they even earn money for their lousy articles!). Not to mention all the organization of the Scenology Faculty, with the expensive dinners, conferences and meetings I have to afford every month. In other words, if you stop to support REVIEW ON SALE Scenarium is not happy. Before beginning with the new load of hot reviews let me remind you the basic rules behind this section. 1- You send me your production; 2- You send me a weighty amount of cash to convince me to write a review; 3- I write a review. More you give me, the better the review is. If you just send your production here without money, you'll end up like the guys from 2Complex1 and their Real. I find their behaviour scandalous, I wonder how could they really think that I could consider their demo good just looking at its quality. Nowadays the most important qualities are in the wallet. 3SOUND issue 1 by SPOON To consider this production a musicdisk is an insult for all the diskmags around, to consider it a diskmag, it's an insult for all the musicdisks. I don't know what this means but I can say without doubts that 2SOUND is the most 2original, revolutionary and abnormal scene production even conceived in scene 2history1. It's not surprising that the astounding idea comes from a woman, 2Christine De La Queen1, whose creativity and generousity is absolute. SOUND is a sort of periodic music disk, which gathers the best modules from all the best scene musicians and is published on a regular scale. SOUND is the ultimate musical experience, where you can taste the melody and the poetry of different music styles, where you can read the brilliant and luminous texts of Christine, where you can discover that 2God exists and lives in your computer1. Sure, without any fear to be contradicted I can assure you that SOUND is one of the few human productions that can kill every doubt amout the existence of something divine in our world. SOUND is that. Divine. The ultimate religious experience, the final discovery, the answer to all your trickiest questions, the justification of everybody's life. 2Don't miss it, you will miss the smell of divinity. 3REAL by COMPLEX So this demo won at the Saturne party II. Well, I wonder why. Maybe its authors have bribed all the voters at the competition. Except us. This demo is a complete failure. Of the few effects shown I have not found anything new or interesting. The usual vectors, some slow attempt of surface mapping, the boring tunnel that leads to a final blank screen (I wonder why we are so stupid to follow always these endless tunnels without any surprise at their end) and the typical sequence of transitions without any effect between them! Where is the demo here??? The music seems made with a broken 2VIC 201, the graphics remind me a 2ZX 801, the code was probably made with 2BLITZ basic1 and the design is near to2 BloodyFucker1 quality! The authors even boast that all this is a file demo and not a trackmo! Sure, probably they weren't able to code a trackload routine. I suggest to all the readers to find this demo, you will have something to laugh about. Don't lose it, 2it's the complex bad joke of a bunch of complexed dudes1. 3THE CHARTS by RAMJAM The Charts are an institution. I have preferred to review them as a whole, instead of considering a single issue. 2The Charts of RamJam are a revolutionary and interesting kind of scene 2production.1 They publish the charts about the best coders, groups, demos, etc in the scene, counting the votes from a moltitude of sceners! I suppose that this is more that enough to raise your interest and your will to read at least one issue of these Charts. In any case the RamJam dudes were not satisfied by the mere charts and have decided to make a real magazine with a lot of hot articles. You can read various interesting sections in each issue of this Chart-Mag: from the 2 reviews1 of the best productions of the month to the useful 2monthly diary1, from the exciting 2amarcord1 to the interesting 2letters to the editors1, from the thrilling 2short stories1 to the sage 2monthly thoughts1. I just have a pair of bad critics to move to this elsewhere perfect production. 2The Pippero of the month1 is a silly and evil section that should be morally refused by all the good readers out there and the 2Spandimerda column1 is just a bad imitation of our original Spandimerda Awards, where shit is really shit and not chocolate cream. I hope that the authors of RamJam will forgive me for these two bad remarks, but after all they haven't given me that great amount of money. I am always open, anyway, to more generous donations that could help me in the difficult task of judging these scene works with more attention. 3NEVER LIKED UNO by LEGO Despite the fact that slideshows are surely the most common kind of scene production, we have not seen many quality works lately. In the overwhelming quantity of slides and relative scrolls, though, we have found a real pearl which can't pass unnoticed. NEVER LIKED UNO contains various pictures from 2Fade 2One1, the well-known Lego artist. He has proably worked in the past with Lonestarr but this doesn't appear in this new set of masterpieces he has had the grace to show us. Fade One pictures are pure art. To the perfect and clean technique he has added a wonderful artistic sensibility, providing images of absolute value. Besides the fact that the spandimerda friends would not be happy to discover that the "UNO" of the promising spandimerda title is not the famous Amiga graphician, 2everything in this production shows style and perfection1. If you don't know what slideshow to buy from your local shop, do not hesitate, 2Never liked uno1 is the best choice. Trust me, I know what I say, I say what I know, I am always careful when I suggest to the beloved readers how to spend their money. I also wonder why our Fade One has not reached yet the top of every chart, he surely deserves that, 2his pictures should be exposed at the Louvre1, at least. 3THE OFFICIAL EUROCHARTS issue 25 by STATIC BYTES Despite all the attempts of imitation, despite the huge number of scene charts around, despite the critics and the envy, despite their generousity to buy this review, we cannot not swear that 2Static Bytes' Eurocharts are the most important 2scene production of the moment. Without their indications on who to vote, the whole scene would be like a flock without guide, helpless and confused. The Eurocharts have always been the best tool to consult when a scener had to vote for the Eurocharts. With the jubilee issue, the 25th, Static Bytes have wanted to break every limit. They have made a total masterpiece and they have made it AGA. For the first time an important scene regular production is AGA only. That means a terrible increase of AGA syndrome cases and lotsa colors. That is. 2This issue is the most revolutionary Eurochart issue ever1. The graphics are totally redrawn in the splendour of their AGA dress, the mag part is pointless as usual but, for the first time on the scene surface, the 2EuroStatistics1 come in! That is the biggest improvement of the Eurocharts 25, even more incident and exciting than the AGA look. 2The Eurostatistics are the dream of every chart 2consumer1, to follow his own carreer in the charts is surely the best thing a scener can do. Those graphs are simply 2erotic1. They induce ecstatic orgasm in the reader, the presence of photos and of other informations about the chart's entries is like a cigarette after eiaculation. Perfect. 2The Eurocharts 25 is surely the most outrageous and erogenous production ever1, it stimulates every part of your body and of your mind, is virtual reality made true, dream made reality, software made woman. 2You can stop to look for a girlfriend, the Eurocharts supply you of everything.