(MKW's party guide - by MKW) Hi again guys. Its now 11:28 and I have just finished watching "Woman in Rad" after going for a strange posh meal with my mother and N&G. Oh dear, what a waste of money! Ok, the food is edible, but it is far to expensive for my tastes! Oh well, at least we were served by a BEAUTIFUL waitress! Oh dear me, here I go on about beautiful waitresses when im sure you would rather be doing something less boring like watching the TV. Are you sure there is nothing on? Actually im a bit pissed off as I missed Married with Children due to this stupid "Woman in red" film. Hey, enough shit, im sure you want to know what me and Road got up to on our 24hr wander dont you? No???? You nutter, im going to tell you anyway - next month!!!!!!!! Talking about games, you may be interested to know that by far my favourite game of the present time is Fast Eddies Pool, so I highly reccomend you start practicing it! It realy is an awesome game when you get into it! Hey, wait a min, this text is as boring as fuck. Now what can I do to improve that situation? Perhaps the Mkw Guide to Partys!  PPPPP AAAA RRRRR TTTTT Y Y P P A A R R T Y Y PPPPP AAAAAA RRRRR T YYYY P A A R R T Y P A A R R T YYYY GGGGG U U IIIII DDDD EEEEE G U U I D D E G GGG U U I D D EEE G G U U I D D E GGGG UUUUU IIIII DDDD EEEEE  1. If you drink too much alcohol you want to go to the toilet with immense regularity, so try to drink near the toilet! 2. If you have a party at your house when your parent(s) are not there then make sure you leave NOTHING valuable about. At EEG's party he had about 20 quid stolen, his table bust in two etc! 3. Have strict control over who enters your house. There are often uninvited gate crashers who are not always too polite or nice! Oh yeah, an example of this is again at eegs house party where people were having sex in his parents AND brothers beds, and people were taking drugs in his bedroom!! Some kenilworthian people are rather evil and violent (Like Road realy!). 4. If you are at someones house then its best to stay overnight so your honest parents , dont see you pissed or see other people having sex in the sittingroom! Its also pretty good fun seeing how badly wrecked the joint is too! 5. Join in all games etc, as they are usualy great fun, especialy physical games when you are drunk! 6. Dont take anything that is offered to drink/smoke as it is often complete shit and will bugger you up for days! 7. Try to attend events at clubs etc (when you are 17/18) rather than partys at peoples houses if you want things to be more civilised! Well, there you are, a completely useless guide to nothing in particular. Mkw over and out 2:55am 22/6/93 - dont let the bed bugs bite!