TITLE:LITTERAE ANTE MORTEM PALETTE:0223 099b 09a9 0b99 BRUSH:04 3 LETTERS TO THE EDITORS 2 Replies by the utterly unexisting one Mister Cool Every mag in the scene has a "Letters to the Editors" column, well we too! It's impressive the number of letters that have not reached our post box, we are really glad of this enourmous success! We hope you can forgive us if we publish just a part of the letters we haven't received. Before some lamer raises his hand to object that we can't publish letters that we have never received I MUST say "Oh God! What's this novelty? Why should we need material letters if we can have them by telepathy???". So, beloved and a bit dumb readers, keep on reading these lovely dream letters, discover how laming cool we are! 2Hallo Scenaria editors! 2 your mag is the best one ever made! 2You are so cool and compared to you RAW is toilet paper! Keep on the wonderful 2work and if by any chance you desire to change your wonderful icons design just 2ask me! I would be proud of painting one for you! Your, Facet We thank you for your disponibility for the graphical design of Scenaria but we think that nobody could make better icons than the ones we have. Thanks the same, man, if you really desire you could retouch the :-> icon, maybe it's not so totally perfect as the rest. Second letter is from a guy that could deserve a better success in the scene, even if unknown we are sure he will be famous, a day. 2Hallo supreme Gods of the Divine Scenaria, 2 I would dare to subdue to your 2attention a story I have written for your mag. Its name is "The name of the 2Rose", hope you will take it into consideration. Humbly your, Umberto Eco. Ok man, thanks for the letter, your story won't be used this time, it's a bit too frivolous for our standards, but try again! Maybe you'll be luckier! P.S. If you write it in English you'll have better chances to be published! Here is a personal letter, it was addressed directly to me, the coolest Mr Cool around... 2Dear Mister Cool, 2 I WANT you! Since the first word I read of yours I felt 2something inside me, a tremendous desire to know you, in the widest way you can 2imagine. Hope you have time to reply. With love, Cindy Crawford. Hallo Cinderella, I will see what I can do, maybe if I find some spare time we can manage to fix a date. Bring with you good looking some female friends of yours. Your, Mister Cool. Many dudes has asked us to compose a module for our future issues, here's one of them... 2Hi guys! If ya want a music for the next issue just ask me, ok!? Keep cool! 2Bruce Springsteen. Ok man, send us your piece, we will see if it can work. CU. Note: Send a longer letter next time! You lamer! Among all the letters received we want to publish this one, written by an anonymous , we have self irony, you know... 2Your mag is a complete shit! Design and code are lame. The articles are boring 2and you are assholes. Hope you won't do another issue, the world couldn't stand 2it. Ok, man, so you haven't the balls to write your name eh? Well, then fuck off and die, of lamers like you the world is full, that's why we can shit on it with our mag! A strange letter reached our places, just look it... 2God bless you, Scenaria editors. I have read your magazine and I consider it a 2prove of the existence of God. Do it again, my sons, people need you. 2I always pray God for it. The Pope. Well....errr.... thank you daddy, maybe we don't exatly have the same opinion about these things and the rest in general but we appreciate your support. P.S. Ask to Him some financial support, please. You know, we are not greedy, but if He helps us... Another more or less known guy has sent us something, here is a part of his letter, we haven't the space (and the will) to publish it all. 2In the name of the people of the United States of America I would like to 2express all my congratulations for your democratic and informative magazine. If 2you need help in advertising and distributing it, please, ask me to help you. I 2would be proud of giving you an helping hand. Your, Bill Clinton. Thank you Billy, we appreciate your support but we think we don't need it, write again! We will send you the next issue with the sign of Pitagora himself! It's always nice to hear opinions also from the editors of other mags, here is what one more or less known main-editor of a more or less known mag has written us... 2I want to take your ideas in Scenaria in Abnormalia and tranfer them to RAW, and 2do them a bit better!!!. Lord Helmet. Thanks Lord, we will see what we can do, for now we suggest you to improve a bit your english, maybe it can become something understandable ;-> Another contribution was from a well-known coder in the scene... 2Hi There! If I give you my whole collection of lego airplanes will you permit 2me to make the new code of Abnormalia? Please do! Lonestarr/Spaceballs. Uhm, your offer is very appealing, DDT strongly wanted to accept it (he is the leader of the Lego Italian Club) but we think that such a bug free and original code as the one we already have can't be rivalled. Anyway, if you will make us the presentation trackmo of the next issue and if you will give us also all your lego sexy dolls, we could accept your collaboration. Think about it! The planet is really full of lamers, just look at what this one wrote. 2[...] Code and graphics are terrible, there are so many bugs and the icons are 2horrible, the same layout and design is outdated [...] You can't do in 1993 a 2magazine without the "PRINT" option! [...]. The Ripper/Nightfall. Well man, you don't know with whom you are talking. Blindness is not a bad thing, but idiocy is! Open your eyes please! 3(Uhm, isn't Ripper a co-editor??? (MACNO)). We received a strange letter from Finland. It simply says: 2Perkele! We wonder why.