Te dowcipy, zamieszczane tu w jëzyku oryginaîu, wszystkie -- bez wyjâtku -- znalezione zostaîy na alt.tasteless.jokes. Sâ zatem -- z definicji -- pozbawione wszelkiego smaku, napastliwe, szydzâce ze wszystkiego i ogólnie sprzeczne z tzw. politycznâ poprawnoôciâ. Redakcja ze wstydem przyznaje, ûe jej czëôê ulega zîemu i nielegalnie ômieje sië z tego typu kawaîów. Czytajcie i wy ;^)
From: gaddgj@vax.sbu.ac.uk Subject: woman, man, ferret! This guy walks into a bar and orders a pint ... the drunk next to him nudges him and says ' Hey buddy .. got this here ferret here in me trousers ..... yours for fifty quid'. So the guy replies 'Fuck off ... I'm not having any ferret thats been down your trousers, and especially not for fifty quid ... I mean what would I want to spend thAt much on a smelly rodent anyways ??' To which the drunk says 'It'll give you the best blowjob of yer life, tell yo what ... free trial take it into the toilet and give it a trial run .. if you like it pay me for it afterwards .. if not .. give it back .. no pressure.' So the guy agrees to this and dissapears into the toilets. Sure enough the ferret gives him the best blow job of his life and he pays the drunk willingly. When he arrived back home to the wife he was so excited he told her straight away.. 'Look what I've brought' 'How much was that' inquired the wife '50 quid' he replies 'What you be spending fifty quid on a ferret for' she demands 'Gave me the best blow job of me life' explains the man 'So what do you want me to do about it' the woman asks 'Teach it how to cook and fuck off !' replied the man
From: SNEAKER@TRKPOOL.OB.RHEIN-RUHR.DE (Carsten Pluntke) Subject: It's a joke, but.... Some guy walks down a beach and finds a strange looking lamp. Rubbing it an enormous djinni appears. The djinni begins: ,,I'm in your debt. But because of the enormous inflation I'm only able to grant you one wish. Tell me, what do you want?'' Guy thinks, pulls out a map showing Israel and the surrounding countries and says: ,,OK then, please stop all the wars and shootings there. No one should be shot anymore!'' Djinni hesitates and replies: ,,That's far too much for my powers, I'm afraid. I must ask you for another wish.'' Guy thinks a bit longer and says: ,,Then are you able to stop all those crappy 'Make money fast' postings in all the computer networks?'' Djinni: ,,Errrr.... mmmm... Would you be so kind and hand me the map?'' OK, here are some tasteless ones: Q: What's the definition of 'sick'? A: Taping breadcrumbs inside on the windowpane and watching the birds batter themselves to death. Q: What's red and cries? A: Peeled baby in a bucket filled with salt.
From: cheryl@intergate.com Subject: Best male bashing joke The man ALWAYS has the last word in every agruement, he says ,,yes dear!''
From: cheryl@intergate.com What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come any way.
From: colin@pears.demon.co.uk (Colin Pears) Subject: School Play The School Play. There were two little boys elected to be in the school play. Each had a small line to recite one being ,,0h, fair maid I have come to snatch a kiss and fill your soul with hope.'' The second boy on hearing this was to say, ,,Hark a pistol shot.'' The night of the play came and the two very nervous boys each saw that his parents were seated in the front row as they came upon the stage. Finally it was time for the first boy to speak and being very nervous he said, ,,Oh, fair maid I have come to kiss your snatch and fill your hole with soap'' On hearing this the second boy even more nervous, said, ,,Hark a pistol pot....a pistil shit, err.. a pitshot...a shit pot...cow shit...... bull shit.... bollocks... I didn't want to be in the fucking play in the first place.!!!!!!!
From: J.J.Smith@ftel.co.uk (John J Smith) How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? THAT'S NOT FUNNY. Or the alternative punchline: 10. One to change the lightbulb, and the rest to SUCK MY COCK! (Ahem, best told louldy in public places) Smid
From: Geech <geech@home.com> Subject: Re: Wanted:your best male and female bashing jokes and stories. Q: How many men does it take to clean a toilet? A: None, that's a women's job!
From: pierce@pat.mdc.com (Cole Pierce) Subject: Ray: Lorena Bobbit jokes!!!! We all know that Ms Bobbitt threw Mr Bobbitt's .. er .. appendage out the car window as she was driving away from the house. What we didn't know was that it bounced off the windshield of a pick-up truck going the other way. Homer turned to the driver and said, ,,Good lord, Abner, didja see the size of the dick on that bug?''
From: bng@gpu.srv.ualberta.ca (brian ng) Subject: Re: Stupid Questions Customers Ask... when i was working in a drugstore i had this girl came up to me and asked ,,should i get the ultra-absorbant or those with wings?'' ,,sorry ma'am, i couldn't tell ya. men don't use maxi pads on a regular basis.''
From: dbruce@adnc.com (Diego Bruce)
Subject: -THE RULES-
1) The female always makes the rules.
2) The rules are subject to change at any time without prior
notification.
3) No male can possibly know all of the rules.
4) If the female suspects the male knows all of the rules, she must
immediately change some or all of the rules.
5) The female is never wrong.
6) If the female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant
misunderstanding which is a direct result of something the male
said or did.
7) If rule 6 applies, the male must apologize immediately for
causing the misunderstanding.
8) The female can change her mind at any given point in time.
9) The male must never change his mind without the expressed written
consent of the female.
10) The female has every right to be angry or upset at any given
time.
11) The male must remain calm at all times - unless the female wants
him to be angry or upset.
12) The female must, under no circumstances, allow the male to know
whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
13) Any attempt to document these rules will result in the
withholding of cooked food, laundry, kindness of any kind, and
sex.
14) If the female has PMS, all rules are null and void.
From: Wacked_out@msn.com (Richard Hammond) Subject: RE: Looking for Men Joke You're looking in the wrong place for ,,clean'' men jokes, pal. Q. How is a man like a snowstorm? A. Because you don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it'll last.
From: zip@inetworld.net (Scott McCoy)
Subject: Rita Rudner's 50 facts about men
Rita Rudner's 50 facts about men.
1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.
2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
3. If you buy your husband or boyfriend a video camera, for the first
few weeks he has it, lock the door when you go to the bathroom. Most
of my husband's early films end with a scream and a flush.
4. Be careful of men who are bald and rich; the arrogance of ,,rich''
usually cancels out the nice of ,,bald.''
5. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world
where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.
6. Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when
he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he
can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players
from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get
off the phone in case they call him.
7. If it's attention you want, don't get involved with a man during
play-off season.
8. Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.
9. Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not
being the first is upsetting to their psyches.
10. All men look nerdy in black socks and sandals.
11. The way a man looks at himself in a mirror will tell you if he can
ever care about anyone else.
12. Don't try to teach men how to do anything in public. They can learn
in private; in public they have to know.
13. Men who are going bald often wear baseball caps.
14. All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my
pillow, instead of a gun.
15. A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually
have jobs and bathe.
16. Men love watches with multiple functions. My husband has one that is
a combination address book, telescope and piano.
17. All men hate to hear ,,We need to talk about our relationship.'' These
seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.
18. Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the
last log does not burn, he will take it personally.
19. Men are brave enough to go to war, but they are not brave enough to
get a bikini wax.
20. All men think that they're nice guys. Some of them are not. Contact
me for a list of names.
21. Men don't get cellulite. God might just be a man.
22. Men have an easier time buying bathing suits. Women have two types:
depressing and more depressing. Men have two types: nerdy and not
nerdy.
23. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out
in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable
heaters that snore.
24. Women take clothing much more seriously than men. I've never seen a
man walk into a party and say ,,Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed; get me
out of here. There's another man wearing a black tuxedo.''
25. Most men hate to shop. That's why the men's department is usually on
the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.
26. If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more
types of lettuce, he is serious.
27. If you're dating a man who you think might be ,,Mr. Right,'' if he a)
got older, b) got a new job, or c) visited a psychiatrist, you are in
for a nasty surprise. The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on
cocoons and butterflies.
28. Men own basketball teams. Every year cheerleaders' outfits get
tighter and briefer, and players' shorts get baggier and longer.
29. No man is charming all of the time. Even Cary Grant is on record
saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.
30. When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.
31. When four or more women get together, they talk about men.
32. Not one man in a beer commercial has a beer belly.
33. Men are less sentimental than women. No man has ever seen the movie
THE WAY WE WERE twice, voluntarily.
34. Most women are introspective: ,,Am I in love? Am I emotionally and
creatively fulfilled?'' Most men are outrospective: ,,Did my team win?
How's my car?''
35. If a man says, ,,I'll call you,'' and he doesn't, he didn't forget...
he didn't lose your number... he didn't die. He just didn't want to
call you.
36. Men hate to lose. I once beat my husband at tennis. I asked him,
,,Are we going to have sex again?'' He said, ,,Yes, but not with each
other.''
37. Men who can eat anything they want and not gain weight should do it
out of sight of women.
38. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem.
,,Get out'' and ,,I never want to see you again'' might sound like a
challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, ,,I love
you... I want to marry you... I want to have your children.'' Sometimes
they leave skid marks.
39. Men accept compliments much better than women do. Example: ,,Mitch,
you look great.'' Mitch: ,,Thanks.'' On the other side: ,,Ruth, you look
great.'' Ruth: ,,I do? Must be the lighting.''
40. Impulse buying is not macho. Men rarely call the Home Shopping
Network.
41. Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.
42. Only men who have worn a ski suit understand how complicated it is for
a woman to go to the bathroom when she's wearing a jumpsuit.
43. Men don't feel the urge to get married as quickly as women do because
their clothes all button and zip in the front. Women's dresses
usually button and zip in the back. We need men emotionally and sexually,
but we also need men to help us get dressed.
44. Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with
superheros. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying
with Barbie.
45. When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she
will assume she has gained weight. When a man tries something from
his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.
46. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female
menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you
get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.
47. Men forget everything; women remember everything.
48. That's why men need instant replays in sports. They've already
forgotten what happened.
49. Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.
50. All men would still really like to own a train set.
From: Edina <chloe@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu> Subject: Re: Polictically correct terms please.... woman: Phallically challenged, Testosterone deficient, Highly intelligent :)
From: ,,Paul Higginbotham'' <paulhigg@worldnet.att.net> Subject: Re: Polictically correct terms please.... Politically corrrect term for a woman: A Vaginal American. Actually, it's ,,Gyno-American'' Politically correct term for fags - Heterosexually challenged.
From: equus@mindspring.com (M.D.B.) Subject: Re: Polictically correct terms please.... Woman = Testosterone Impaired
From: roberts@ucunix.san.uc.edu (Michael A. Roberts) Subject: Re: Jokes about Musicians David Patton <pattsd@aud.alcatel.com> wrote: >Q: How many guitarists does it take to screw in a light bulb? >A: 11; 1 to do it, the other 10 to say, ,,I could do it better!'' I heard it as: A: Nine. One to change the bulb, and eight to sit around in a circle, talking about how much better Eric Clapton would have done it.
From: Martha E. Lange <prmtsupt@ix.netcom.com> Subject: Re: Jokes about Musicians zahner@ix.netcom.com(Terence M Zahner) wrote: > Q: What does a stripper do with her asshole before going to work? > > > A: She drops him off at band rehearsal Why are piano benches brown? Beethoven's last movement.
From: bluesman@bga.com (KingBee) Subject: Re: Jokes about Musicians What does a bass player use for birth control? His personality.
From: theoden@onramp.net Subject: Microsoft's Finest One of Microsoft's finest techs was drafted and sent to boot camp. At the rifle range, he was given some instruction, a rifle, and bullets. He fired several shots at the target. The report came from the target area that all attempts had completely missed the target. The Microsoft tech looked at his rifle and then at the target again. He looked at the rifle again, and then at the target again. He put his finger over the end of the rifle barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand. The end of his finger was blown off, whereupon he yelled toward the target area: ,,It's leaving here just fine. The trouble must be at your end!''
From: tedw@netaccess.co.nz (Ted Witwicki) Subject: Hitler I was walking down the street in Brazil the other day. I saw an old man across the road, his grey hair was swept to one side, and he had a small grey moustache, and I thought that this could be Adolf Hitler! I crossed the road and stopped this person, ,,Excuse me sir, are you Adolf Hitler?'' ,,Yar'' he replied. ,,What are you doing here-I thought you died in a bunker in Berlin'' I exclaimed. ,,Every tink I am dead but you zee I am here. I am planning the Fourth Reich'' he said. ,,What do you intend to do?'' I asked ,,I vill kill 6,000,000 Jews and two Hedgehogs'' he said smugly. ,,Why two Hedgehogs?'' I asked ,,You see'' he replied, ,,no one cares about zee Jews''
From: amorency@mdc.net Subject: how many alcoholics... to change a light bulb?? Two. One to hold the bulb and one to drink 'till the room spins.
From: Tomas Björklund <qdttbj@toedt.ericsson.se> Subject: Joke 'Terrible news'. There is this man seeing his doctor, and the doctor tells him, ,,I have some bad news and some terrible news for you.'' The man says, ,,Lets hear the terrible news first''. ,,The terrible news'', says the doctor, ,,is that you have cancer. I'm sorry but you only have one year left to live.'' ,,Oh no'', says the man. ,,The bad news'', the doctor continues, ,,is that you've got Alzheimers disease.'' ,,Alzheimers'' says the man, ,,I guess it could be worse. I mean, I was afraid you were going to tell me that I've got cancer.''
From: Lorin David <lorin@bc.sympatico.ca> Subject: Re: NEW: Why your computer is better than a woman (WARNING! Offensive to women) If only that were true! Old but good obj: Q: What's the difference between a woman and a computer? A: When a woman goes down on you, it's foreplay. When your computer goes down on you, you're FUCKED!
From: anorman@sofkin.ca (Al Norman) Subject: Re: NEW: Why your computer is better than a woman (WARNING! Offensive to women) <lorin@bc.sympatico.ca> wrote: Q: What's the similarity between an erect penis and a computer? A: They'll both stay up as long as you don't fuck with them!
From: Donna Thompson <bajha@usit.net> Subject: Polish lesbian Did you hear about the Polish lesbian? She dated men.
From: zip@inetworld.net (Scott McCoy)
Subject: Three Pigs/CORRECT Vers.
Once there were 3 little pigs who lived together in mutual
respect and in harmony with their environment. Using
materials that were indigenous to thesarea they each built a
beautiful house.
One pig built a house of straw, one a house
of sticks, and one a house of dung, clay and creeper vines
shaped into bricks and baked in a small kiln. When they were
finished, the pigs were satisfied with their work and
settled back to live in peace and self-determination.
But their idyll was soon shattered.
One day, along came a big, bad wolf with expansionist ideas.
He saw the pigs and grew very hungry in both a physical and
ideological sense.
When the pigs saw the wolf, they ran into
the house of straw. The wolf ran up to the house and banged
on the door, shouting, ,,Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!''
The pigs shouted back, ,,Your gunboat tactics hold no fear
for pigs defending their homes and culture.''
But the wolf wasn't to be denied what he thought was his
manifest destiny. So he huffed and puffed and blew down the
house of straw. The frightened pigs ran to the house of
sticks, with the wolf in hot pursuit. Where the house had
stood, other wolves bought up the land and started a banana
plantation.
At the house of sticks, the wolf again banged on the door
and shouted, ,,Little, pigs, little pigs, let me in!''
The pigs shouted back, ,,Go to hell, you carnivorous,
imperialistic oppressor!''
At this the wolf huffed and puffed and blew down the house
of sticks. The pigs ran to the house of bricks, with the
wolf close at their heels. Where the house of sticks had
stood, other wolves built a time-share condo resort complex
for vacationing wolves, with each unit a fibreglass
reconstruction of the house of sticks, as well as native
curio shops, snorkelling and dolphin shows.
At the house of bricks, the wolf again banged on the door
and shouted, ,,Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!''
This time in response, the pigs sang songs of solidarity and
wrote letters of protest to the United Nations.
By now the wolf was getting angry at the pigs' refusal to
see the situation from the carnivore's point of view. So he
huffed and puffed, and huffed and puffed, then grabbed his
chest and fell over dead from a massive heart attack brought
on from eating too many fatty foods.
The three little pigs rejoiced that justice had triumphed
and did a little dance around the corpse of the wolf. Their
next step was to liberate their homeland. They gathered
together a band of other pigs who had been forced off their
lands. This new brigade of porcinistas attacked the resort
complex with machine-guns and rocket launchers and
slaughtered the cruel wolf oppressors, sending a clear
signal to the rest of the hemisphere not to meddle in their
internal affairs. Then the pigs set up a model socialist
democracy with free education, universal health care and
affordable housing for everyone. {My note: well it is a
fairy tale after all.}
Please note: The wolf in this story was a metaphorical
construct. No actual wolves were harmed
in the writing of the story.
^\/^\/^\/^\/^\/^\/^\/^
CURIOUS about our little horde of Chucklemongers? Drop me a line. We are
always looking for enthusiastic readers of our humorous material/jokes.
We are, as always, brought to you by The Exclusive Society
for the Preservation of Preferentially Gregarious and
Magnificent Chuckleheads and Chucklettes Humor Addicts
Anonymous:)
From: zip@inetworld.net (Scott McCoy) Subject: Tin & I THE PEARLY GATES (NO, NOT BILL...) Two poets had died at the same time and arrived at the Pearly Gates. However, heavenly rules would only accept one poet at a time and St. Peter announced a poetry contest for the two. The subject for a 4-lined poems was to be ,,Timbuktu''. The poets rushed away and started writing their poems and after only 2 days the first poet begged for admission. He read his poem: Crawling through the desert sands, Crawling both on knees and hands, Destination came to view, Destination Timbuktu. ,,Well, not bad,'' said St. Peter, ,,but we will have to hear the other poet's poem,too.'' The other poet obviously went through a painful period of working, as it took him two weeks to arrive with his poem. It went: Tim an I, we hunting went, Saw three maidens in a tent They were three and we were two, so I bug one and Tim bug two.
From: amorency@mdc.net Subject: truly tasteless, disgusting joke A girl in a real dive of a bar picked up a guy and took him home. They started screwing and she asked him if he wanted 69. They guy was dumb as a box of hammers and didn't know what she was talking about. The girl proceeded to show him. Well he was having a good time at it until the chick cut a nice fart right up his nose! He coughed a little and waved if off and went back at her. Again she did it! He waved it off again. After the third time he'd had enough. He squirmed out from under her and started getting dressed. The chick asked hime what was he doing? He said: Hey that was ok but I don't think I can take 66 more of those.
From: bwray@gte.net (Bryce Wray) Subject: Re: Another punny joke! Since all these in this thread seem to originate from ,,Reader's Digest'' joke pages of 20-odd years ago, why not one more? This one's vintage '73, I think . . . The city zoo decided to replace the tiles which made up the ,,floor'' of the gnu's big cage. The maintenance foreman had the old tiles removed, but the shipment of new tiles arrived too late in the day to get any work done, so -- figuring the gnu wouldn't bother the tiles -- the foreman had the tiles placed in a corner of the gnu's cage until the next morning when work could begin. Next morning, the workers arrived and found that somehow some of the tiles had been put into place. They all quickly agreed that none of them had stayed late or come in early, and told the foreman somebody apparently had started the job for them. The foreman knew nothing about it, but had an odd theory. He sent the men home and told them to return the next day. That night, the foreman hid out near the gnu's cage and waited. Sure enough, after all the humans had apparently gone home for the night, the gnu began to do the tiling! The foreman quickly went for the head zookeeper to show her this amazing sight. They watched as the gnu went on placing the tiles. Then the foreman whispered to the zookeeper, ,,I don't understand. I thought he was just an ordinary gnu.'' The zookeeper answered, ,,He is.'' The foreman pondered this and then said, ,,Well, I guess he's a typical gnu and tiler too.'' << Non-U. S. folks may not get this one -- ,,Tippecanoe and Tyler Too'' was the slogan from the successful campaign in the 1840 U. S. Presidential election. >>
From: jenny@idiscover.net (PeeJaye) Subject: Bar Story A friend of mine, after leaving the Air Force, took a part-time job in a local bar. He started out cleaning up throughout the night, as he learned how to mix drinks, tend bar, etc. He was soon promoted to bartender, and soon began working long shifts. There were many regular customers, but there was one man that stood out above the rest. This man came into the bar at 6:00 each evening, ordered shot after shot of Jack Daniel's and left by 8:00. Soon, my friend became accustomed to this man, and would have the shots of Jack lined up on the bar before the man arrived. The man came in, drank his shots, and left as normal. This went on for several months until one night the man came in, looked at the shots lined up on the bar and said, ,,You know, I think tonight I will have some vodka instead.'' Puzzled, my friend asked him why, after limitless months of drinking Jack, he all of a sudden stopped drinking it and switched to vodka. ,,Well,'' said the man, leaning closer toward my friend, ,,last night, after drinking the Jack, I went home and blew chunks.'' ,,Aw man, that's nothing,'' said my friend. ,,One can only drink so much, you know, it's not surprising that you blew chunks...it happens, man.'' ,,No, you don't understand,'' said the man. ,,Chunks is my dog.''
From: zip@inetworld.net (Scott McCoy) Subject: Bar/Polish Guy This guy's in a bar, and a big, strong guy comes in and sits right next to him. The guy, not knowing the man next to him is Polish, sais; ,,Anyone want to hear a Polish joke?'' The big man next to him looks at him, and replies; ,,Hey! I'm Polish, why don't you tell the joke when I bring my friends out?'' and the big Polish man proceeds to call about 7 names, and seven big, strong guys come in and crowd around the small man, looking ready for a fight. ,,So you want to tell that joke now?'' says the Polish man. ,,Nah,'' replies the man. ,,Why not? Ya chicken?'' teases the Polish guy. ,,No, I just don't feel like explaining it eight times.''
From: Mr. Sinister <adamst@mmsmtp2.ColumbiaSC.ATTGIS.COM> Subject: Barbie/G.I.Joe joke **DO NOT READ IF OFFENDED BY TASTELESS JOKES** When the mother asked her little girl what she wanted for her birthday, she said that she wanted a Barbie doll and a G.I. Joe doll. The mother smiled and said, ,,But honey, Barbie comes with Ken.'' The little girl replied, ,,No Mommy, Barbie fakes with Ken, she comes with G.I. Joe.''
From: Avital Pilpel <ap241@columbia.edu> Subject: Re: c'mon people post some jewish jokes! two jews decide to assassinate Hitler. So they buy a revolver and wait in a street corner that they know Hitler passes every day at 12:00 PM. 12:00 comes by, and hitler does not show up. 12:30, 1:00, no sign of hitler. At 1:30, one of the jews says: ,,Oy Vey, I hope nothing happened to him!''. Two jews sitting on a Yellow bench in berlin in 1936. One of them reads a Yiddish newspaper, and the other reads ,,Volkeisher Beobachter'' [the people's voice - the oficial Nazi party newspaper). the first jew asks: ,,How can you read that?'' - I read it to relax. - You read THAT to relax? - Yes. You see, when I read the yiddish newspaper, I see that there is Nazism in Germany, antisemitism in Poland, America will not take any jews, the brits are blockading palestine - everything's terrible. But when I read ,,Volkiesher Beobachter'', I see that the jews are ruling everywhere, they decide on politics, they control america, they own all the money - so I relax... Avital Pilpel