BEER IS SHIT!

   If  you manage to load this article
then  it means that it managed to pass
around  Lord's  scissors, (He's a beer
drinker) which is a victory in itself.
The  point  I  will  try  to  make is:
BEER  IS  SHIT!!!
I  can  image  now  the armies of beer
drinkers jumping around in their rooms
(tripping  over  heaps  of  empty beer
cans  &  bottles) shouting with anger:
LYNCH!   LYNCH!   WE WANT BLOOD!  KILL
THE BLASPHEMIST!!!  Well, fine...

   Ok, as I see it, you can drink beer
because  of two reasons:  you like the
taste   or  you  want  to  get  drunk.
Taste?   What  taste?   Beer is one of
the  worst  tasting  substances I have
ever  tried  to  consume  in  my whole
life!  It's bitter and the after taste
in  your  mouth  - YUCK!!!  But, I can
still   imagine   someone   liking  it
(hardly,  but  I  can).  And I respect
the  people that drink beer because of
the  taste, you see, everybody has the
right be weird as much as he likes.
   But,  the  people  saying that they
drink  beer  to  get  drunk  I  simply
despise!   That   was  brought  to  my
attention  after all those articles in
various  mags  about  drunk  people on
parties  or  many  Which_beer_is_best?
articles and even (!) some discussions
on  the  same  theme.  I mean, how the
fuck  can  you  get drunk with beer???
All  those 'beer drunks' on parties ar
100%  pure  fakers!   Beer has between
0-10%  of alcohol in it.  In  order to
get  drunk from beer you would need to
drink  3  litres of the damn stuff and
you   can't  possibly  drink  so  much
without  puking  right  afterwards!  I
just can't believe all the hype that's
created  around  beer!  If you want to
get  drunk  than  go  for wine or even
better  vodka  or  rum and then you'll
find  out  what  'drunk' really means!
And  with as little as half a litre of
vodka  you get a kick same as from 2.5
litres  of  beer!  And a litre of wine
will be  sufficient for most people to
get  nicely  drunk.   That's about the
equivalent of 2 litres of strong beer!
And  if  you  go  for  taste  then buy
yourself a Cola or even better a fruit
juice!
   In  the  end  let  me make one last
thing  clear:  I am not a drunk nor am
I encouraging people to become one and
least  of  all I am not a beer expert!
I  just  wrote  this  to sting some of
those  fake  drinkers  at the parties,
and  to help people recognize them for
what  they  really  are.  If you don't
agree with what I wrote or you want to
clear  the  good name of beer (I would
sure  want to see that!) then write to
us and prove me wrong!


           Dr.J/PLS