³¼DR.MUD ANSWER-¼³ ³¼MACHINE¼³ ¹ Hi and welcome to Dr.Mud's wellknown answermachine. We have got some really interesting letters this time and that makes of course the answers even more interesting. But let's jump right out of the closet and take the first letter. Dear Mud. Two months after I had anal sex with you, my dick began to suffer several serious and probably lethal unknown diseases. It looks like a cheese pizza with a salami topping. So dear Mud, could you please tell if you happend know exactly what kind of veneral diseases you're suffering from? I know I'm asking for a lot and that such a list wil require an awful lot of disc space but pleaseeeeee.. Yours: ³Mr. Ah-Nal, Iran.¹ Allahs ! Mr. Ah-Nal It sure was nice to hear from you again. I thought you had dumped me after our little (heavy?) accident that night at the motel. A cheese pizza with a salami topping, you say. Well, I'm sorry to tell you, but I doubt that it's me, who have given you these nice symptoms. I more into turning dicks to pussy's (Well, many of my former men have complanied about loosing the dick and just have a hole instead. But, you should talk with my friend Exe-stickitup of Scoopsex. I have heard that he have the symptoms you're talking about. Mine: ³¢Mud¢³ ¹ Dear Mud. I have a few suggestions for some new categories in your charts: 1. Biggest fan of Executioner/Scoopex 2. Best fan letter written to Exe/Scx I'd be very pleased if you would bother to include these charts in your splendid magazine. I know my motives are rather selfish since I'm probably the biggest fan of the fabolous Executioner like all of my predecessors. But I do think that all the faithfull fans of the outstanding Executioner deserves this gratitude. Mr. Bill Clinton, U.S.A. Yo Billy Boy ! I have discussed this matter with TFG and we actually found some of your ideas really good. Atleast the two catagories. But since we have never heard about anyone calling themselves something as stupid and hopeless as Executioner, we have decided to use the catagories at ourselves. So two new catagories are born in our charts: Biggest fan of Mud & TFG/Majic 12 ! Best fan-letter to Mud & TFG/M12 !! Thanx for your help. ¢³Mud in seventh heaven¢³ ¹Dear Mud. I have a plea for you. I'm doctor S. H. Rink, the manager of the Ebberoed Psychiatric Hospital, and I'd like you to aid us in our treatment of the mentally deranged people we are dealing with at our hospital. I'd kindly ask you to take part in our group therapy sessions. It would most definately improve the mentally deranged patients of ours to see that they aren't the most retarded people in our soceity. You will of course receive a most generous payment. A payment which will suit you perfectly. We offer you the possibility to become the proud owner of either the new model '93. We sincerely hope you'll find our offer most irresistably and that you'll reply to us as soon as possible. Dr. S. H. Rink Beloved S.H.Rink ! Thanx for your most generous offer. It almost pushed me off as main-editor. Ecspecially you payment was something that I like and of course thre fact that I would be able to work with someone wiser than me, a thing you can't say about the other main-editor. But as I already has a job in this magazine and furthermore are looking for a job in the London Zoo without any sexual prejudices, I have enough to look after. Sorry ! ³¢Mud¢³ ¹ Dear answerer, How long would my parking-ticket exists? Kenka-lusikka Well questioner ! I have to inform you that your parking-ticket got out of time about a month ago and that means that you have to pay either 50000 pounds to me or give them to the Association Of Bigger Dicks To Elephants. ³¢Mud in orga&$#¢³