|1-A SELECTION OF RANDOM JOKES By Mike / QI These "jokes" were created by a program I have, that generates random sentences out of different categories of words. All of it is user definable, so I set up the program to churn out a series of sentences with the structure of some jokes. By the way, the program I used is called "Lyr-o-mat" -------- Why is a beastly radio not a useless highway? Because your sweet packages aren't clean! How doesn't a beer force a incredible street? By standing it's TV set! How won't a TV set give me a imbecile dining room? By writing your plug! There was an Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman, and one beastly year, they counted to Compstall, and they might have bought a sweet raspberry, so the Englishman said "why don't we swallow a cat", then the other two thought "that isn't a large ocean"! How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? 5, 3 to guide my book, and 20 to stand her slow horse! How many closets does it take to change a light bulb? 100, 9 to read my kitchen, and 7 to write his lonely airplane! ^1^^340 |1-"We are not amused" |1-Says Elderly Spinster There was an Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman, and one red year, they printed to Kent, and they might not have counted a dirty package, so the Irishman said "why don't we swallow a painting", then the other two thought "that wasn't a big dog"! What do you call a bed with 50 photos? A 5 chaired lovely airplane! What is the difference between a TV set and a horse? One of them is a bad multitasking photo, the other is a TV set crying apple!!! What is the difference between a TV set and a book? One of them is a lovely taking dog, the other is a highway seeing dining room!!! What do you call a dining room with 20 cats? A 8 monked comfortable lemming! How won't a dog jump a merry desk? By selling my dining room! Why wasn't a cd-player a useless living room? Because it is a hell of a fast pencil! Why is a greasy TV set not a lonely bird? Because her green packages aren't imbecile! There was an Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman, and one yellow month, they cried to Woodley, and they might have cooked a hot cat, so the Englishman said "let's not swallow a mailbox", but the other two thought "that is a cold drawer"! How many programs does it take to change a light bulb? 100, 25 to sit his skyscraper, and 50 to go his useless vacuum cleaner! There was an Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman, and one well month, they cried to Denton, and they might have drank a flowered lamp, so the Irishman said "why don't we cry a program", then the other two thought "that was a useless raspberry"! How does a lemming lie a big lamp? By guiding it's beer! Why is a small hedgehog not a slow car? Because it's senseless cars are green! Why was a computer disc a incredible living room? Because it is a bloody large pencil! Why wasn't a house a honest tree? Because it was a hell of a chocolate-flavoured street! How won't a kitchen jump a useless airplane? By selling your computer disc! How many living rooms does it take to change a light bulb? 3, 25 to eat his AMIGA, and 6 to leave it's small lamp! There was an Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman, and one small day, they given them to Manchester, and they might not have given a green living room, so the Englishman said "let's run a plug", then the other two thought "that is a celestial apple"! Why wasn't a airplane a comfortable radio? Because it isn't a bloody comfortable tree! What do you call a sewer with 20 houses? A 1000 raspberryed big raspberry! How many radios does it take to change a light bulb? 4, 4 to give your ocean, and 25 to give me your small pencil! Why is a chocolate-flavoured raspberry not a fast program? Because my imbecile paintings aren't senseless! How many citys does it take to change a light bulb? 1000, 50 to go her mountain, and 20 to sit your greasy skyscraper! How does a street sit a honest highway? By beating my ocean! How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? 50, 3 to throw his photo, and 50 to leave my comfortable apple! What is the difference between a skyscraper and a house? One of them is a good peeling photo, the other is a lemming fantasising kitchen!!! Why is a marvellous book not a chocolate-flavoured bed? Because his good chairs are big! What do you call a nun with 15 speakers? A 20 sewered yellow kitchen! There was an Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman, and one yellow year, they felt to London, and they did guided a impossible vacuum cleaner, so the Scotsman said "why don't we buy a street", then the other two thought "that is a merry computer"! How many birds does it take to change a light bulb? 2, 8 to force it's car, and 1000 to cook it's flowered apple! What do you call a radio with 25 radios? A 50 raspberryed green liquor! How many beers does it take to change a light bulb? 4, 25 to look my highway, and 15 to walk it's big house! Why is a beer a senseless bird? Because it is a hell of a slow mailbox! Why was a program a white cd-player? Because it was a hell of a sweet street! How many nuns does it take to change a light bulb? 1000, 15 to give it's pencil, and 15 to leave it's useless living room! How many houses does it take to change a light bulb? 4, 1 to take your monk, and 1000 to swallow his chocolate-flavoured photo! Why wasn't a cable a bad AMIGA? Because it is a hell of a beastly highway! How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? 10, 10 to sit my kitchen, and 1000 to go his good bird! How many lamps does it take to change a light bulb? 10, 15 to lie your dog, and 7 to count your small computer! How many trains does it take to change a light bulb? 1000, 20 to throw his computer, and 50 to count it's yellow nun! What do you call a ocean with 20 radios? A 1000 trained marvellous mountain! What do you call a ocean with 1000 birds? A 25 cared white package! Why was a dishwasher a cold program? Because it isn't a hell of a sweet nun! Why wasn't a kitchen a greasy radio? Because it is a hell of a greasy program! -------- If you found them funny, then it was either a bizzare coincidence or you're pissed.